Theodoros Blog

Going to Church

Going to church

We've been a little spotty in our church attendance lately, having missed out on about half of the services for the past couple of months. As such, I feel a little "out-of-step" after missing church for all these weeks, and am motivated to get back into the fold soon. However, before I get back into the Sunday routine, I'm processing some of the reasons of why I go to church.

I go for a lot of reasons, of course. I go out of habit - it's what I've been doing for almost the past two decades. I go to see friends and to make new ones. I go out of a sense of duty - like the way I give money to charity or visit a friend in the hospital. I go because sometimes I enjoy the sermons and believe that it's good for me - like the way I believe that reading a good book, or going to the gym is good for me. But beneath all such reasons, I think, more than I might realize, I go to find peace - peace in Christ.

For all of its beauty and wonder, this is a dangerous world we live in. Lurking around the corner for many of us are hardships and trials that will push us to the limits of what we are made of. Some of us have already been through such storms; and all of us have waiting for us storms still yet to come. So I go to church in faith - faith that to worship together, to pray together, to receive the bread and wine in silence together, even when my mind wanders off to some distant space, is to somehow draw near to a mystery of life-giving peace and holiness that is far beyond the storms of this world, much like the way a child reaches out in the darkness for a hand to take hold of.

 

Nouwen on Loving the Church

Loving the Church

Loving the Church is our sacred duty. Without a true love for the Church, we cannot live in it in joy and peace. And without a true love for the Church, we cannot call people to it.

Loving the Church does not require romantic emotions. It requires the will to see the living Christ among his people and to love them as we want to love Christ himself. This is true not only for the "little" people - the poor, the oppressed, the forgotten - but also for the "big" people who exercise authority in the Church.

To love the Church means to be willing to meet Jesus wherever we go in the Church. This love doesn't mean agreeing with or approving of everyone's ideas or behavior. On the contrary, it can call us to confront those who hide Christ from us. But whether we confront or affirm, criticize or praise, we can only become fruitful when our words and actions come from hearts that love the Church.

The Church often wounds us deeply. People with religious authority often wound us by their words, attitudes and demands. Precisely because our religion brings us in touch with the questions of life and death, our religious sensibilities can get hurt most easily. Ministers and priests seldom fully realize how a critical remark, a gesture of rejection, or an act of impatience can be remembered for life by those to whom it is directed.

When we have been wounded by the Church, our temptation is to reject it. But when we reject the Church it becomes very hard for us to keep in touch with the living Christ. When we say, "I love Jesus, but I hate the Church," we end up losing not only the Church but Jesus too. The challenge is to forgive the Church. This challenge is especially great because the Church seldom asks us for forgiveness, at least not officially. But the Church as an often fallible human organization needs our forgiveness, while the Church as the living Christ among us continues to offer forgiveness.

It is important to think of the Church not as "over there" but as a community of struggling, weak people of whom we are part and in whom we meet our Lord and Redeemer.

 

- Henri Nouwen

Popo (1918-2009)

Popo

Last Saturday January 17, 2009, my Grandmother (whom we affectionately called "Popo" in Chinese) passed away peacefully in her sleep. She was 91, and had been living with cancer for about 2 years in a Toronto area nursing home. She is on my mother's side and is the last member of her generation within my extended family. She has 7 children, 11 grandchildren, and 8 great-grandchildren. In total, including sons&daughters-in-laws, she leaves behind 32 of us.

Popo was a relatively quiet lady but very active into her later years. When the weather permitted, she would take long walks for hours on almost a daily basis. She had a few friends whom she would play mah-jong with on most days of the week. Despite her relatively quiet demeanor, she was a tiger when it came to mah-jong. Her sharpness of mind and quick agility in tile-placement made her second-to-none when it came to this favourite pastime of hers. I for one was never able to even come close to sitting at a table with her. She was much too fast for me. Popo was also a very good cook, yet to be surpassed by anyone in the family for her tasty soups, congee and sticky-rice wraps. Because of her highly selective palate, she ate very little whenever we went out. There were only a handful of restaurants that met her tastes, and even then she would only pick at a few dishes. For example, I remember her always leaving behind the meat from a steamed bbq-pork bun and only eating the bun. 

Because of our language barrier, I never got to know Popo as well as I would have liked to. There is a wealth of family history and life experience that I have missed out on learning from her. She was a survivor of the WWII Japanese invasion of Hong Kong, where they terrorized and brutallly massacred a majority of the local population. By chance, my grandfather was away on a business trip at the time of the invasion, and as such his life was likely spared. Popo was left alone with her children to face the invading Japanese soldiers. Her 3 oldest sons were killed by the Japanese. Details of this piece of family history are sketchy, as neither she nor my grandfather ever spoke of it.

Popo immigrated from Hong Kong to Toronto in the early 1970's. She made her way through life in Toronto and eventually settled into the same neighbourhood for well over 30 years. She was a part of my childhood, having helped take care of my sister and I during our preschool years. I grew up with weekly visits with her and lots of home-cooked meals from her. I miss her soups and sticky-rice wraps already.

Good-bye Popo. I miss your smile. Things won't be the same without you. Rest in the peace of Christ.

 

Martin Luther King Jr.

 

 

MLK

In honour of Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, I’m sharing some of my favourite quotes from him:

 

"When our days become dreary with low hovering clouds of despair, and when our nights become darker than a thousand midnights, let us remember that there is a creative force in this universe, working to pull down the gigantic mountains of evil, a power that is able to make a way out of no way and transform dark yesterdays into bright tomorrows. Let us realize the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice."

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."

"Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend."

"History will have to record that the greatest tragedy of this period of social transition was not the strident clamor of the bad people, but the appalling silence of the good people."

"If a man hasn't discovered something that he will die for, he isn't fit to live."

 

While many are familiar with his work in civil rights, it hasn't always been recognized that Martin Luther King Jr was more than a civil rights leader - that at his core he was a follower of Jesus Christ. His faith in Christ was the force behind his ability to love his enemies while facing persecution and sacrifice for his work as a civil rights leader. King was jailed, beaten, stabbed, had his home bombed, and ultimately sacrificed his life (he was assassinated on April 4, 1968 in Memphis Tennessee). He was first a pastor of a Baptist church in Alabama in 1954 when he was 25 yrs old; and later became the youngest person to receive the Nobel Peace Prize for his work to end racial segregation and racial discrimination through civil disobedience and other non-violent means in 1964 when he was 35 yrs old. By the time of his death in 1968, he had refocused his efforts on ending poverty and opposing the Vietnam War - his efforts being clearly driven and shaped by his firm commitment to follow Christ at all costs.

I'm inspiried by Martin Luther King Jr. to live for something larger than myself; and recognize that he was able to sacrifice and love his enemies in the face of suffering only because Jesus Christ first loved him.

A Reflection for the New Year

 

 

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It's January 2, 2009. The holiday parties are over, Christmas trees are being taken down, and a new calendar now sits on my desk. Another year has turned and a new season has begun. But before I embrace the new year, I am taking some time to reflect on the events of 2008 and contemplate how I should move forward in 2009. "Taking stock of my life", if you will. Maybe it's old age but I find I need to do this now every year. It seems that the years fly by faster and faster, and with our increasingly hectic schedules life easily starts to blur for me like scenes from outside a window of a fast-moving train.

Highlights for 2008 are many - Benjamin's first steps as a toddler; the discovery that baby #2 is on the way; a marriage conference Jeanie and I attended called "Love & Respect"; getting Hand-Foot-Mouth disease not once but twice (an unpleasant but educational experience); our annual trip to Southern California (Orange County and San Diego); my annual 3-day hiking trip in New Hampshire's White Mountains; a short impromptu trip out to Vancouver/Whistler to catch up with old friends; family visits from Korea and Seattle; and many small occasions of ordinary kindness and grace from friends both near and far. In all, I know that I am undeservedly very blessed.

Yet, between all the events coupled with the demands of work and fatherhood, there hasn't been much time to do many of the things I would've liked to do (including keeping up with this blog) - That said, some memorable moments of the past year include: peaceful early morning walks with Coco when it's still dark outside and everyone is sleeping; reading a good book with Jeanie in bed before we call it a night; and walking out of the gym feeling like a million bucks after a good work-out. All great moments that brought satisfaction. But when it comes to what really matters in the end - it isn't accomplishments or places that I'll remember and cherish - it's people. Spending time with my family and friends that God has blessed me with, loving my son, growing with my wife, deepening new friendships and recalling the blessings of many old ones... those are the things that colour my world. I wonder if this year I can spend more time and attention to people instead of just trying to get another task out of the way. I want to be present. I want to live that abundant life that Jesus came to give us and modeled for us. This is my primary resolution. To be holy - really. Not the pious, religious spirit that substitutes for true spiritual life, but the calm, still, open-armed, self-less, joy-filled presence of Christ that sets itself apart from the momentum of the world. For without holiness, the bible says, no-one can see God.

 

"Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh, and the greatness which does not bow before children." - Kahil Gilbran

"Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace." - Frederick Buechner